The Jewish Museum

I had a fantastic day with my parents. We went to the Jewish Museum and then did a little shopping, followed by dinner. Overall it was just a nice day. After dinner we went back to my apartment where I read my mom a bedtime story. Of course, I had to read the weird story in my old jewish yenta voice. It was just fun and silly. I think we had a good time.

You are getting sleepy!

On Saturday, I took a leap of faith and decided to get hypnotized to correct my nail biting habit. I was skeptical at first but hopeful. I have to say - I think it helped a lot. I feel more aware of my habit and find it easier to resist biting. My hypnotist was very interesting and holistic. He really has inspired me to become more holistic myself. I am thinking about changing my lifestyle habits, by cutting out diet coke, trying to eat more fish and getting more sleep.

Practically Perfect in Every Way

Tonight I went to see Mary Poppins on Broadway. I went with my sister and we had FANTASTIC seats - 2nd row center orchestra! Overall, the show was really fun. However, the most exciting part for me was the guy who played Bert. After reading his bio I learned that A - he was Australian and B - he used to be on Neighbours! I nearly freaked out! When I lived in Australia I watched Neighbours all the time. Neighbours is a really cheesy soap opera that follows the people who live on Ramsay street. It's not as scandalous as the US soap operas, but it still is a fun show to watch.

After the show I waited by the stage door to tell him how psyched I was to meet a guy who was on Neighbors! He laughed. It was awesome!

Come fly with me!

So, last night I went to a trapeze class with a bunch of my friends. I was so excited to go - in fact I have been looking forward to it all summer long. I was really pumped to do it and it was fun, but not as awesome as I thought. I think I thought I would have done better. In a way, it was a disappointment. I was disappointed in myself and my performance. It's probably because I am way out of shape. I think if I performed a bit better it would have been as awsome as I wanted it to be. I'm glad I did it though.

Dinner Date

I planned a lovely evening for me and my brother. Too bad he had better things to do and ditched me after dinner. Maybe next time we'll get to spend more quality time together. At least we were able to hang out for a little while.

Father's Day

Today was Father's Day, and surprisingly we had a lovely day. I hosted a brunch at my apartment for my family and then we played trivia pursuit. It was a lot of fun.

What I like about you!

Today was a good day and the first day of the month. After having a few depressing days, you tend to appreciate the good ones. I need to keep busy and a positive attitude. Anyway... I thought it might be a good time to try to attempt to accomplish #97.

Write something positive about myself every day for a month.

June 1, 2009 - I think I'm funny. If I didn't have a good sense of humor - my life would be a complete mess. I'm able to find the humor in my not-so-funny life situations.

June 2, 2009 - I've been thinking about what I can say, and right now all I can think of is that ... I'm nice. Saying "I'm nice" is something people say when they have nothing better to say about someone. I can't believe that I have nothing to really that great to say about myself. My friend, Fran, told me I was really thoughtful. That is nice - isn't it!

Hmmm... Ok, so part of this task is making me find something good within myself. I have to say that I'm very emotional, honest and open with myself. I am proud to be so open, although sometimes I think I am open to a fault. I have been in therapy for years, and I am constantly learning about myself and am willing to share my findings/feelings with the world. In a way, I guess it's brave to be that open.

June 3, 2009 - Someone asked me today why I was so mean to myself. I really didn't know what to say to that. I thought I was being funny. I told him it was my defense mechanisms and a way of covering up my pain through humor. See, I told you I was funny! Ok - so something nice. Hmmm.... this is really hard! I'm a good eater? No, just kidding. I try to be a good sibling to my brother and sister, and I try to be good to my family. I'm a little proud that stood up to my overbearing and somewhat controlling dad today. But, I did it in an appropriate, adult way. No one yelled or screamed, and I didn't end up crying. So... a success!

June 4, 2009 - I am trying to be active, productive and accomplish my goals. That's a pretty admirable quality, right? On a kinda funny site note, I just googled "positive qualities in a person", so I can think of positive things to say about myself. I'm all ready for tomorrow's post!

June 5, 2009 - I think I am a funloving individual.

June 6, 2009 - I feel like I'm finally getting into the drivers seat of my life. I havent started driving, but at least I'm adjusting my mirrors. So today, I am going to say that I'm empowered.

June 7, 2009 - Today was a lonely day. It's hard for me to push myself to do stuff when I don't have someone to do it with. Anyway, what can I say that is nice about myself. Honestly I really am not sure what to say. Now that I can't think of something, I will refer to google. Aha - I am curious and thoughtful. I think about things way too much sometimes, but maybe it's a good thing.

June 8, 2009 - I am looking into joining a gym, and I received a trial pass to the Reebok gym. It's an awesome place to work out. I did a stretch class, the rock wall and the eliptical. I'm most proud of myself for attempting the rock wall. Although I didn't get to the top, I did a pretty good job. Ok, so it's not a quality/characteristic, but I'm doing something that makes me feel good about myself. So... does this count? Plus I completed #18. I think I'm going to try it again later in the week.

June 9, 2009 - I am really tired right now and just want to think of something quickly. Hmm... I went to the gym because I am unhappy with my body. That's a good thing.

June 10, 2009 - Went to the gym again - that's a good thing. Today at work someone marveled over how open I was. He thought it was refreshing. Oddly, it made me feel uncomfortable. Ont something nice to say - I'm caring and friendly. Why does saying this not make me feel better about myself?

June 11, 2009 - Soooooooo Sore! Now onto positive things. I'm hard working? Hmmm... Let's go to google. I'm authentic and sincere - I think.

June 12, 2009 - When did I start disliking the weekends. Lately my weekends have been boring, lonely and depressing. The first weekend in a while that was supposed to be fun has started off with a bang - and not in a good way. I spent part of the night crying and thinking. Why do I have to think so much, the more I think the more upset I get. I dont understand people and I am misunderstood. People cant stand me and I cant stand myself. Not a positive thing to think, but its true. I feel so worthless and awful. I just want to go to bed. Sleeping is positive - right?

June 13, 2009 - Another terrible day full of tears. Here is something positive. I care too much for other people and can't stand myself. That's awesome! Maybe one day I will actually find value in myself and will be able to stop caring about what others think or say. Right now, I really only find value in myself when others give it to me. That is how I judge myself - based on how others view me. What a sad existence I live.

June 14, 2009 - OK, well it's actually June 16th today. I missed a few entry's, so I wanted to revisit them today. On June 14th I got incredibly drunk, and don't fully recall much of the day. However, I did catch up with an old friend - which was really nice. In my drunken stupor I dialed my parents and my mother told me she hadn't heard me this happy in a while. Several hours later I was throwing up.

June 15, 2009 - So I threw up right into June 15th and I will quote my mother, "Think of the bright-side, maybe you will lose a few pounds." It was real rough going into work, but I am glad I did. Later that evening I called a friend and was able to work though a misunderstanding (for a lack of a better word) that had a big role in why I was so upset on Friday, June 12th.

June 16, 2009 - I saw my ex-boyfriend and I still am hopeful we will remain friends. It was nice to see him and I am happy he is doing so well. I also gave blood today, so I am saving lives.

June 17, 2009 - Not much to say, just happy that its not the weekend. The weekends are the toughest. I wish I had something really positive, but I don't. If anything I'm a little disappointed in myself. I always manage to complete my to-do lists at work, but when I get home, I become a lazy loafer. I just want to relax - I really need to be more proactive.

June 18, 2009 - I went to the movies by myself. In some ways it was empowering - in other ways, it made me feel like a loser.

June 19, 2009 - Nothing really to report. I am glad that i feel like I have a purpose for my weekend. I'll be hosting Father's Day brunch at my apartment on Sunday, and will be spending most of my weekend prepping for it.

June 20, 2009 - I met up with a friend for lunch. He is one of the few people in this world who I always have fun with and I feel like he get's me - and vice versa. We are both a little bit troubled and lost, maybe that's why we get along so well. It's nice to have that with someone.

June 21, 2009 - Today's Fathers Day and I am glad that I was able to have a nice day with my family. Plus it kept me busy this weekend.

June 22, 2009 - I maturely spoke with a friend about a misunderstanding. And even though the outcome is slightly disappointing, I'm glad we talked about it. Sometimes its difficult to do the right thing. In some situations - there is no right thing.

***It's already July, and I didn't finish this task. Way to go! I meant to continue to write, but lately I have been going through a rough period of time and had really nothing good to say. Maybe it's good that I didn't continue this task. I can always try it again another month.***

Peek-a-boo

Who sees me? I really don't know who I am, so how could anyone else really see me? I wonder what people think when they look at me? I would love to be able to hear other people's thoughts and really be able to see them. I know my thoughts are totally insane. Like, before I was fantasizing about having an out of body experience where I watch myself bleed to death. Weird - right! I guess I'm just having a tough time right now. I'm feeling really needy without having someone in my life who can help define me. There are so many things I should be doing to help me be happy and feel a bit better about myself. I think I ultimately just don't think I'm worthy of anything yet.

So, this is becomming more like an online diary than a blog - but hey. I'm not ashamed or embarrassed.

Dare to Bare

Jessica, Meredith and I went to see an off broadway show called Naked Boys Singing. The show is fairly self explanitory, it's a bunch of boys who were singing and dancing on stage completely naked. There was no real plot - just naked. It was kinda weird and awkward to watch. I was laughing a lot because it was so ... awkward. I felt like little school girl freaking out because of a penis. Speaking of penis - I kinda expected to see some nicer and bigger ones on the actors. However, I will give them a lot of credit. It takes a big person (no pun intended) to perform in the nude. I couldn't do it. They must be very confident and have good self esteem.

No Sauce.

This one's for you Hil! You've inspired me to blog a bit more often. I still plan on blogging about my 101 in 1001, but sometimes there isn't much to say about those items. Somtimes I have other things I want to say. Who are we kidding - I always have something I want to say. It may be theraputic - and we all know how much I love therapy!

Anyway, so tonight I went to book club. Book club is always good time. We usually laugh and eat alot. Probably the two things I do best.

A major decision

This has been my first real weekend alone, and I have to say I felt a little lonely. Let me backtrack just a bit. I broke up with my boyfriend (Dan) a few months ago. We dated for 4 1/2 years and lived together for almost 2 of those years. Overall it was a good relationship, but I think we are better off as friends than we are as girlfriend/boyfriend. I do hope that we both end up meeting people who make us extremely happy - and make us want to be better people.

Breaking it off with Dan was a major decision. And, if you know me - you know decisions are not my forte. It's extremely difficult for me to make a simple decision, like what to wear or eat, so... a major decision is really tough.

Dan recently moved out of our apartment, and this is the first time in my life where I will be alone. No parents, no siblings, no roommates - just me. It’s probably going to be a very different and somewhat intimidating experience. To be honest, I am really scared. What if I find out that I really don't like myself! Does that sound silly? Well, it's just a bit of a concern. I'm also afraid that I will be lonely. This is really the first time in my life where I will make my own decisions on a daily basis and not get feedback from anyone else. Hopefully I won’t beat myself up if I make mistakes.

In the past I never really took the time to get to know myself or make my own choices. I always did what was "expected" or what others thought I should do. I think it will be good for me to live alone. I want to take this time to get to know myself a bit better, and I hope it makes me a better person. Maybe I’ll find out that I am a strong, independent woman who is proud of who she is – whoever that may be.

Tea for Two

Sunday felt like a great New York Kinda day. I met my girlfriend (not lover, but girl who is a friend) for brunch. We went to a place called Alice's Tea Cup. It's super cute there! And... although we were there for brunch, we had a formal high tea. We had tea, sandwiches, cookies and more. It was really yummy! Plus, after lunch we did a little shopping. What a perfect way to spend a rainy Sunday in New York!

#81

I bought new bedding and am not sure how I feel about it. I absolutely LOVED my last bed set. It was a beautiful sage green, but after five years the comforter began to shred. The sheets also ripped too. I'm not in love with my new set, but at least it was relativey inexpensive!

At least the colors go with the apartment. Plus it is only temporary - I assume I will want new bedding in a year or two. Let me know what you think.

Twilight

It's 4:01 in the morning and I just finished reading Twilight. It was fantastic and I plan on reading the second book in the series soon! I also want to see the movie. This is going to sound so stupid, but the book reminded me of my "high school" crushes. Whenever I was around those crushes I remember feeling anxious, excited, happy, triumphant and scared - all at once. It's hard to explain, but there were moments of that all throughout the book. Every girl should be so lucky to find their Edward - someone who is dangerous, beautiful, intelligent, protective, and wholeheartedly loves them.

Baby Wipes and Phone Cards

Today, Meredith and I created and sent a military care package through http://www.treatsfortroops.com/. We participated in their Foster-A-Soldier program, which was great since we don't know anyone in the armed services. Our soldier, Jeremy, is in the Marines and is originally from Texas. He will be receiving baby wipes, gatoraide, a phone card and a Burt's Bees starter kit. I hope Jeremy likes our gift! I also hope he gets to call his wife and kids with our phone card. It's feels good to do some random acts of kindness!

Back from London

I planned an incredible London vacation for my boyfriend's 3oth Birthday (#36). I purchased the book Twilight for the plane and am working on finishing it (#45). While we were in London I was able to complete #7: Attend a Tottenham Hotspurs Game. It was awesome! I nearly wept when we were seated. It took me months to coordinate the game and our trip to London, and this game was the highlight of my work. Our seats were three rows from the field and I knew that this woud make my boyfriend incredibly happy. It was just an emotional moment for me.

The Mission: Complete 101 preset tasks in a period of 1001 days.

The Criteria: Tasks must be specific (ie. no ambiguity in the wording) with a result that is either measurable or clearly defined. Tasks must also be realistic and stretching (ie. represent some amount of work on my part).

Why 1001 Days? Many people have created lists in the past - frequently simple goals such as New Year's resolutions. The key to beating procrastination is to set a deadline that is realistic. 1001 Days (about 2.75 years) is a better period of time than a year, because it allows you several seasons to complete the tasks, which is better for organizing and timing some tasks such as overseas trips or outdoor activities.

Keep track of my progress:
Completed tasks
Tasks in progress

I'm really excited to get started!

Lofty, Long-Term achievements
1. Explore career opportunities (Received Job Offer from Michael C. Fina. Yay! - 3/27/09)
2. Find alternative sources of income (i.e., babysitting, sell jewelry, event planning, etc.)
3. Follow through with my therapy recommendations
4. Get closets professionally organized (i.e., California Closet)
5. Quit biting my nails and get manicures bi-weekly
6. Study Hebrew or Spanish or Sign language

One-time Tasks
7. Attend a Tottenham Hotspur Game (1/18/09)
8. Clean out my inbox
9. Coordinate a pot luck picnic in central park with friends
10. Create and send a care package for the Military (2/5/09)
11. Cut out soda for one week (12/1/09)
12. Encourage someone else to do the 101 in 1001
13. Enjoy a high tea (tea sandwiches, desserts and all) (5/3/09)
14. Gather my mom’s holiday recipes (Kugel, Brisket, Turkey, etc.)
15. Go apple picking
16. Go to a dermatologist
17. Go to a first Friday (jazz under the stars or Guggenheim DJ thing)
18. Go to a ropes coarse/rock wall (June 8, 2009)
19. Go to a taping of a TV show (Daily Show, Colbert Report or SNL)
20. Go to a trapeze class in the summer (08/07/09)
21. Go to an event at Lincoln Center
22. Go to Disney World (or Disney Land) with friends
23. Go to Ellis Island and try to find my ancestors
24. Go to Friday Night Services
25. Go to the Bronx Zoo
26. Go to the Jewish Museum or Jewish Heritage Museum (11/7/09)
27. Go to the Madonna Inn
28. Go to the Museum of Sex
29. Go to the Sony Wonder Technology Lab (2/14/09)
30. Go to the Statue of Liberty
31. Go to the Top of the Rock (1/26/10)
32. Go to the US Open
33. Host a brunch (6/21/09)
34. Host a poker night
35. Host Shabbat Dinner (6/18/10) http://www.yjpnewyork.org/r/?event=shabbatjune&host=traceyserber&page
36. Plan a dream vacation for someone other than myself (1/5/09 - Dan's Bday Gift)
37. Plan a GNO
38. Plan a Murder Mystery night or Game night
39. Plan an activity for my family (Father's Day 2009)
40. Plan an activity with my brother (idea: take my brother to a sports bar for dinner) (8/4/09)
41. Plan an activity with my father (idea: go to a golf driving range)
42. Plan an activity with my mother (idea: go to an art Museum w/my mom)
43. Plan an activity with my sister (idea: see a show with my sister)
44. Read Dan’s screen Play (probably won't happen since ...)
45. Read the first Twilight book (2/8/09)
46. See Michael Buble in concert
47. Send an email (on a random day) to my closest friends letting them know how important they are to me
48. Take a break dancing class
49. Take a burlesque or pole dancing class
50. Take a hot air balloon ride
51. Take a tennis lesson
52. Watch a movie under the stars (8/4/10 - Julie & Julia at Pier 54)

Ongoing Activities
53. Attend 3 free events in NYC each season (free Fridays, movies under the stars, see the holiday windows, etc.)
54. Be in bed by 11:30PM everyday (during the work week) for 2 weeks straight (I am ususally in bed by 10 PM with my new job)
55. Bring lunch to work at least 3 days a week (I bring lunch at least 3 to 4 times a week)
56. Call my grandmothers once a week (
57. Cook a full meal four times a year (1/27/09: Pineapple Chicken, 3/25/09 Lettuce wraps)
58. Cut coupons for grocery shopping
59. Do “bare essentials” for 2 months in a row (in a way, I did this while I was unemployed from January 2009 - April 2009, but think I should try again)
60. Do not bite my nails for one day (10/25/09)
61. Do not bite my nails for one month
62. Do not bite my nails for one week
63. Do some form of stretch, yoga or pilates 3 times a week for 3 months
64. Do something crafty once a month (make jewelry, create a scrapbook, bake, etc.) (Jan - jewelry, Feb - baking, March - cooking, April - photo albums, May/June - slightly redecorate)
65. Dress professionally for work at least twice a week (at my new job, I actually have to dress professionally every day - I can't wear jeans, even casual Friday)
66. Drink 3 to 6 glasses of water a day
67. Eat 3 servings of fruit/vegetables everyday for one month
68. Eat an apple a day for 1 month and see how I feel
69. Get books from the Library for book club (or borrow from other members)
70. Keep on top of my Flex Spending Account (2/27/09 - 2008 completed)
71. Play a board game 3 times a year (6/21/09 - trivial pursuit, 9/4/09 - cranium & catch phrase, 11/20/10 - Taboo, 11/26/10 - trivial pursuit)
72. See 3 Broadway/ Off-Broadway shows a year (5/29/09 - Naked Boys Singing, 10/7/09 - Mary Poppins, 1/2/09 - Wishful Drinking, 8/15/10 - Can you lend me a tenor, 9/3/10 - Promises, Promises, 10/19/2010 - In the Heights)
73. Take advantage of Restaurant week and go to a place I REALLY want to go to
74. Tidy up my apartment for 5 to 10 minutes daily for one month
75. Update my 101 in 1001 weekly
76. Use all my gift cards before they expire
77. Use eye cream daily
78. Watch a political show or finance show once a week
79. Watch the news twice a week

For myself
80. Add money to my Roth IRA account (2/2/09, 5/26/09)
81. Buy new bedding
82. Clean my apartment every Sunday for one month
83. Do some form of volunteer work
84. Eat a meal at restaurant by myself without feeling like a loser/weird
85. Go through my closet and get rid of things I don’t wear (5/25)
86. Learn how to make earrings
87. Open and put $50 a month into a high interest savings account.
88. Pick a weekend and do a spring cleaning (get rid of stuff you do not need, organize, clean, etc.)
89. Plan a big party for my 30th birthday (this didn't happen - I had a small and intimate b-day party that was fun, but not what I really wished for. Maybe I will have a big party for another big b-day)
90. Renew my license (It's official, I'm a New Yorker! 9/3/09)
91. Renew my passport (Sent out paperwork on 9/17/10)
92. Save money to go on a spa retreat (like a canyon ranch where you can exercise and get spa treatments)
93. Send out Hanukah/Christmas cards to friends and family (11/27/10 - sent to close friends and family)
94. Send out Rosh Hashanah cards to friends and family (8/31/10 - Sent to Mom, Dad, Holly & Jeff, Grandma Roz, Uncle Paul, Aunt Linda & Uncle Steve, Grandma Kitty, Meredith, Talia, Matt & Jessica)
95. Sort through important paperwork and organize it
96. Take my medication more responsibly
97. Write something positive about myself daily for one month (June 2009)

101… Now What?
98. Create a new 101 in 1001 when this is over
99. Donate $1 for every task not accomplished on this list to a charity
100. Roll-over everything not accomplished on this 101 onto my next 101 in 1001
101. Try to build a scrapbook of my 101 accomplishments (take pictures of events/activities, take mementos, etc.)